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MY PHYSICAL HANDICAP PARALYZED ME MENTALLY TOO I (@bibi_wheelchair_traveller) had been diagnosed with ALS in 2006, but that didn’t cause me as many psychological difficulties as another turning point in my life related to the progression of my disease. It was when I dropped out of my studies in Vienna at the beginning of 2008 for health reasons when my boyfriend and I had to give up our apartment and I moved back home (at the other end of the country) alone. That doesn't sound dramatic in itself, but that's how I perceived it. All my friends and people of the same age as me made big steps into the future, into growing up, into being independent. I only took steps backward: moving back home to my parents, not pursuing an education... and furthermore the wheelchair beckoned, which meant that soon I wouldn't take any more steps anyway – neither forwards nor backward. All these thoughts and circumstances combined with the fact that I lived separately from my boyfriend, led to the definite lowest point of my self-confidence and finally caused social anxiety. It was hardly possible for me to be with people. I felt so uncomfortable and insecure I couldn't think clearly and therefore didn't want to talk to anyone. I stayed away from family gatherings, events, and friends for fear of losing control and embarrassing myself. I distanced myself more and more, and I myself suffered the most from it. The whole situation made me feel even more like a loser who leads a boring life between parent's home and working place. Especially the contact with people of the same age was difficult for me because I thought I was even more likely to be classified as "strange" amongst them. My boyfriend was the only one who knew about these psychological problems. Of course, he suffered with me, couldn't go anywhere with me and had to excuse me very often. After two years the situation relaxed. Yes, I've had two sessions with a psychologist who prescribed me antidepressants against panic attacks, which I‘m still taking today. However, I’m convinced that the situation improved mainly because my boyfriend moved back to where I was living because we started looking for a flat together and I finally had the feeling that I was gaining a foothold in "normal" life again. In addition, I have certainly matured mentally in these 2 years and have become a little more self-confident. But maybe it was just a mixture of all three circumstances, who knows. Today I feel recovered in this respect and I enjoy meeting people, even if sometimes small remnants of this psychologically difficult time emerge and I haven‘t been able yet to COMPLETELY get rid of some nervousness and insecurity in certain situations. But life is a constant learning process, isn’t it?

לאלוהים יש תוכנית גדולה וטובה יותר "ואתה לא צריך לשנות דבר, העולם יכול לשנות את לבו" - אליסיה קארה הלילה חשבתי לאחור על ה-15 בנובמבר 2017 - יום לפני הניתוח שלי. הבנתי שאני הולכת לניתוח כדי ליישר את עצמות הרגליים שלי, לחזור הביתה למחרת או לאחר יומיים, לעבוד עם צוות הפיזיותרפיה הפנטסטי שלי (שאני מתגעגעת אליו מאוד ושידעתי שיעזור לי להיות אפילו יותר טוב משהייתי לפני) ולחזור לחיים נורמליים עם פעילויות היומיום כגון נהיגה וחזרה למכללה. עבדתי כל כך קשה בנהיגה ובמכללה, והפיזיותרפיה הייתה רק כמה חודשים לפני כן. בזמן ששיחזרתי את מה שקרה, דמעות מילאו את עיני ומיתרי הלב שלי החלו להימתח... ביליתי חודש בבית החולים ובשיקום עם שילוב של מטפלים וסיבוכים. חזרתי הביתה רק כדי לחזור פחות משבוע לאחר מכן. נאמר לי שאני צריכה לצאת מסמסטר, אני שוב בבית הספר (באינטרנט) עכשיו, אבל מאוד עייפה וכאובה כל היום. זה הרבה יותר קשה מקודם, אבל אני עוברת את זה. אני מרותקת לביתי עם שירותי בריאות ובלשון המעטה, רוב המטפלים שלי לא עושים את מה שהם אמורים ומאוד חסרי נימוס. אם אתם בתחום הרפואה אתם אמור לעזור לאחרים להירפא, לא לגרום להם להרגיש גרוע יותר נפשית או פיזית ולא לעשות את העבודה שלכם. אני לא יודעת אם בכיתי הלילה כי הייתי גאה בכמה כוח הייתי צריכה כדי לעבור את זה, או כי אני מתגעגעת להישגים שלי ולאנשים שעזרו לי להגיע אליהם, או קצת משניהם. ידעתי שהחיים שלי ישתנו עם הניתוח הזה, אבל לא עד כדי כך, אבל התוכניות של אלוהים תמיד גדולות יותר. אני אחזור למקום שבו הייתי. רק במצב טוב יותר. תודה ל-Yoocan שמאפשרים לי לקרוא ולשתף סיפורים מעוררי השראה לאורך העליות והמורדות של החיים. למרות מצבי "אני ואתם יכולים לעשות הכל" 💗 God Has a Bigger and Better Plan "And you don't have to change a thing, the world can change its heart" -Alessia Cara Tonight I was thinking back to November 15, 2017- the day before my surgery. I had the understanding that I was going into a surgery to straighten my leg bones, go home the next day or two, work with my fantastic outpatient physical therapy team (who I miss very much and who I knew would help me get even better than I was before), and get back to normal life engaging in everyday activities such as driving and going back to college. I worked so hard at driving, college, and PT just a few months before. As I was replaying what actually happened, tears filled my eyes and my heartstrings began to pull... I spent a month in the hospital and rehab with a mixture of therapists and complications. I came home just to go back less than a week later. I was told I had to withdraw from a semester, I am back in school (online) now but very tired and in pain the entire day. It’s a lot harder than before, but I’m making it. I am on homebound healthcare services and for lack of better words, most of my care providers haven’t done what they are supposed to and have been very disrespectful. If you are in the medical field you are supposed to help others heal, not make them feel worse mentally or physically by not doing your job. I don’t know if I was crying tonight because I was proud of how much strength I’ve had to have to get through this, that I miss my accomplishments and the people who have helped me get there or a little bit of both. I knew my life would change with this surgery, but not this much, but God’s Plans are always bigger. I’ll get back to where I was. Just better. Thank you to Yoocan for allowing me to read and share inspiring stories throughout the ups and downs of life. Despite my situation “ I can and yoocan do anything” 💗

The road to Ivy's Hemiplegia diagnosis So my pregnancy with Ivy was pretty standard stuff. I had a few episodes of reduced movements and her heart rate was super high a couple of times but other than that it was completely normal. We had around 4 scans, 12 weeks, 20 weeks a detailed scan at around 24 weeks (checking for any signs of a heart defect/condition, due to myself having a heart condition) and a growth scan here and there. Nothing was picked up on any of the scans. I was induced just 1 day earlier due to all the episodes of reduced movement. Delivery was perfect with no complications. Everything seemed perfect- another little girl to add to our family. We had her checks as usual 8 weeks, etc. All were fine nothing was picked up. I started to notice at around 3/4 months, she wasn’t giving her left side very much attention, not including it in play, not really using it, so I left it a little while to see if she was just being lazy. It didn’t improve. When our health visitor came around for the 6-month check, I mentioned the lack of use of her left side to her. She sat with us for an hour and agreed with me. She scheduled us a GP appointment for that day. We went to the appointment where the doctor assessed her and told me she wanted to refer Ivy to the paediatricians as she was unsure whether it was just a need of physio or whether there was an underlying condition. Around 2 weeks later we had our appointment with her pediatrician, he examined Ivy and asked the usual questions about pregnancy, birth etc. He then went to get his consultant who also examined her. Then we were met with the heartbreaking news “I think Ivy has hemiplegia, a form of cerebral palsy.” I remember trying to hold back the tears, she booked us in for an MRI, physiotherapy and occupational therapy. I remember leaving the consultants room an emotional wreck. I knew something wasn’t right but I was not prepared for something so so big. She had her MRI within 2 weeks and a week later we were back in the consultant's room. We were told the MRI confirmed her suspicions. The brain damage was significant. Her brain hadn’t developed properly on the right side, of course, so many questions were going through my head, I asked how it could have happened. She told us that she doesn’t know what happened and we may never know what caused it but all she could tell us was something happened early on in pregnancy, that starved her brain of oxygen. She told us we were lucky she survived the pregnancy and that she was unsure if Ivy would walk, talk, etc. Here we are nearly two years later and Ivy has defied everything they said to us. Ivy is walking, her speech is second to none and she is matching her peers in all aspects. She truly is our miracle.

10 Things We Learned from Dating Someone in a Wheelchair If you are new to the world of wheelchairs your life has probably been filled with new experiences and new information. Over the years we have learned many things about being in a relationship with someone in a wheelchair. Some lessons have been life altering, some lessons have hurt physically and some lessons leave us in a fit of laughter. Here's our top 10 list of things we have learned from being a wheelchair spouse. 1. People are going to stare; and that's ok. When we say stare, we mean an array of different looks. Some are pity stares, some are curious and some are just downright rude. Continue with confidence and don't take it personally. 2. All spinal cord injuries and people in chairs are different. Before we knew our men on wheels we thought if you were paralyzed it meant from the waist down. Essentially, you just couldn't move your legs. We learned very quickly that this is not the case. Each injury level or disease is as unique as each individual person and story. 3. The world is not wheelchair accessible. Next time you go for a walk, bike ride, or drive, take a look around you. Notice the stairs without ramps? Notice the curbs without openings? Notice that the bar your in only has high tables? There is still a lot of work to do to make this world more wheelchair friendly. 4. Shit happens... or doesn't. When you're in bed, in the car, out for dinner. Same with pee...when you're least expecting it. 5. UTI's are the man's version of PMS. Seriously, don't mess with a man who has a UTI; they are hormonal, they have cramps and they are miserable. And no, throwing chocolate at them doesn't work. 6. Skin Issues. Due to limited or zero sensation, being aware of cuts, bruises and sores is very important. A skin issue gone unnoticed could be critical and lead to a hospital visit. 7. Assume they can do anything without help unless they say otherwise. There is nothing they find more frustrating that people helping them do things that they can do themselves...like open the door, or put their chair in their vehicle. 8. It's ok if it doesn't work out. A relationship is a relationship and no one should feel pressured to continue one just because your partner is in a chair. 9. All jobs are purple jobs. In most relationships there is a division of labor. Guys jobs and girls jobs; blue jobs and pink jobs. But when you're in a relationship with a person in a wheelchair the blue and pink get combined and every job becomes purple. 10. Be aware of where your toes are at all times. Casters hurt... a lot. Despite our list there are endless things we have learned and continue learning. One thing we can agree on that has been a major learning lesson is that dating or marrying someone in a wheelchair is the same as having a relationship with an able bodied person. It may take a little getting used to, but soon enough the wheelchair disappears and what you are left with is all the “normal” aspects of living and loving with a significant other. Pushing on... Sam & Chelsea

How many of you reading this believe that experiencing struggles are a bad thing? I’m sure there are thousands that would agree with that statement. In fact, I used to be one of them. Society teaches us to push away the hard stuff. It leads us to believe that if we’re not always happy and living our days free from obstacles and hardships, then we’re not doing this whole life thing right. So, as a result, we resist when it comes to the hard stuff. However, rather then resisting, what if we starting embracing the struggles instead? The Lessons in the Messes with Spinal Muscular Atrophy I was diagnosed with Spinal Muscular Atrophy at six months of age and given two years to live. To sum up the last 27 years of my life and quote every millennial out there, “the struggle is real.” From as early as I can recall, however, my parents taught me how to be strong and rise above any challenge life was going to throw my way. They taught me how to rewire my thoughts from resisting my struggles and, ultimately, allowing it to consume me to embracing my struggles and not giving it the upper hand. As a result, some of my greatest lessons have been learned through my toughest messes. And, by embracing the mess, there is one piece of advice that will always hold true for me and, hopefully, you as well: where you find your struggle, you will find your strength.

The Accident On September 19th, 2010 I was injured in a car accident. I lost control of my Chevy s10, the ground was slick that day send the little pick-up fishtailing. It spun completely around facing the opposite direction before getting to the ditch and flipping up hitting a tree. My side of the vehicle was crushed but luckily my passenger only had a few scratches. I on the other hand was trapped, they had to use the jaws of life to get me out. Then I was loaded in an ambulance to ride over to life flight who was in a hay field across the road, where I was taken to the hospital. I went through many tests, they found out I had broken many ribs, both my scapula’s, and my back, paralyzing me at the T10-T11 level (Spinal Cord Injury). I then went through a 10-hour surgery to fix my back where they put in the first of two rods, and a week later they put in the second rod as well as tried to rebuild my vertebrae it lasted about 8 hours. I spent long 64 days in the hospital. I remember being told had I been driving the speed limit or faster that day I would have died. I can tell you that this was difficult time for me I missed two whole months of my senior year of high school while I healed. The one thing I am thankful for is that I did take a few classes in the hospital and managed to get back to school in December, and that spring I was able to graduate with my class. I went through major times of depression. I had to relearn how to live life from a wheelchair and being told I would never walk again took its toll on me mentally. I took years before I felt that it was alright for me to really live and to try and get out there and do things. Now Now 6 years later, I am licensed to drive with hand controls, I am taking online college courses (hoping to take some on campus this spring), I am getting the opportunity to test the ReWalk this month, and I am looking for a horse so I can begin riding again. I have ridden maybe a total of 6 times since my accident so with the help of my horse trainer we are looking for my perfect match so hopefully soon I will be back in the saddle. This experience has taught me to never give up, there is always another day to try again.

An Interabled Family Meet the Cross Family (@cross_family_adventures). We're an "inter-abled family" - Dad with a Spinal Cord Injury, two kids with lots of energy and Mum who keeps it all together. We're a regular, everyday family, going about our everyday lives... with one little difference - the wheelchair. We've recently begun sharing our life and adventures in the hope that, in doing so, we can break down the barriers and remove the stigma regarding what it means to be a family living with a disability. Dane had a sporting accident in 2001, sustaining a Spinal Cord Injury which resulted in him becoming a C5 Quadriplegic (complete). Since then, Dane has met and married Stacey and have had two amazing sons (Ashton and Dawson). As an "inter-abled family", our adventures often present challenges but that doesn't stop us from living our best life and chasing our dreams. We have hundreds of stories from past and present adventures and we look forward to sharing them with the Yoocan community!

This New Life of Mine I started working with people with disabilities in college, clear back in 2006, and I loved it. It became one of my greatest passions. I worked at a residential program, a preschool for kids with autsim, and a summer camp for all ages and disabilities. I started taking special education classes and learned so much. Then I started my dream job and became a stay-at-home Mom in 2014. I loved it but I missed my other passion. And then my second son Jackson was born. He was perfect. A beautiful, healthy, chill baby. I remember telling my husband, there's something about this baby. I could feel it. Around 8 months old our family started noticing his eyes made clicking movements when we would rock him. I hadn't really noticed but said I would mention it to his pediatrician. His doctor said it looked like he had nystagmus and asked if I noticed anything else about him. I thought, now that you say that, he's not sitting or rolling very much. His brother who crawled at 14 months and walked at 20 months, was sitting by 8 months. He referred us to a neurologist so we could see if there was more going on. After many doctor appointments, blood work after blood work, we recieved a diagnosis for our sweet boy in October of 2016. I knew something was going on as soon as the pediatrican referred us. I knew we could recieve a diagnosis but on the day we did, it's like I forgot. Wait, what? He has what? Will he walk? Will he talk? Are the questions I asked the neurologist. It's so rare she didn't know what to tell me. Since then we have worked with genetics doctors to find the gene associated and they can't find it. So technically our sweet boy is undiagnosed. We don't know what he has or why his body works differenly then ours do. I mourned the little boy I thought I had and the life we were going to have. I was so excited to have my boys 17 months apart. I was so excited for the them to grow up together, play sports together and be best friends. I knew that would still happen, it was just going to be different then what I had imagined. I let myself mourn, I let myself process it and then I accepted it. I knew not accepting it wouldn't get me anywhere. I knew Jackson would now be on his own timeline with development and that it was perfectly okay. I don't compare him to his siblings, friends, or the chart at the doctors office. He does things when he's ready and when his body will allow. And that is my advice for any Momma or Dad that receives a diagnosis for their sweet baby or child. Process it, mourn and then accept this beautiful, new life you've been given. You’ll meet people you never would have met. You’ll learn things you never would have learned. You’ll advocate and you’ll help change the world. Welcome to this new life! Photography by Kylee Ann Studios and Photo by Mad

Hi, I am Vaiva and I'm 22 years old. I live in Lithuania. I have Cerebral Palsy from birth. The disease affected only my movement, so I sit in a wheelchair. I am studying accounting and in my spare time, I enjoy volunteering and traveling- I have many friends who love to travel. If I can share one thing with you it is that disability does not prevent an active life. Get out there.”

Unlearning to relearn When Laksh was born, I felt cheated and betrayed. I left like, despite doing everything right, I got a baby that was not “normal”. We barely had any time to look up Down syndrome, when another surprise was waiting for us. When Laksh was less than a day old, he vomited bile and the doctors and nurses rushed in and admitted him to the NICU. All we were told is that vomiting bile is not normal and that something was wrong with him. As new parents, my husband and I were terrified. I remember only crying and praying. At that moment it did not matter whether he would be able to walk, speak, drive or find love, all that mattered was that my baby be heathy. Our son had to be transferred to a better-equipped NICU in Manhattan so my husband and my one-day-old baby left in an ambulance while I stayed back at the hospital all alone as I was one-day post-op. Our son was later diagnosed with Hirschsprung’s disease and we were told he needed surgery in order to survive. When he was just 3 weeks old, he underwent his first surgical procedure, which went on for more than 7 hours. These were the longest 7 hours of our life. My brave baby came out of it like a champ. Two weeks later, as we were getting hopeful of going home, Laksh vomited again. This time the scare was worse and we were told that he might need another life-saving surgery. Thankfully, it wasn’t that serious. He had developed adhesions that needed to be released. Down syndrome is not limiting At 2 months and 5 days old, our son finally came home. The second best day of our life. The first was obviously when he was born. Today Laksh is 2 months away from his 2nd birthday (August 1st). In the last 22 months, I have hardly ever thought of Down syndrome to be a limiting factor. Yes, I did grieve the perfect child that I was hoping for but once that was done, I came to realize there is no one more perfect than my precious baby boy Laksh. Limitations are only limiting when we give them that power. Take people for who they are and not what the world conditions you to believe. Laksh is more loved because and not despite his diagnosis.

🎗✨ I'm Melanie. I'm a 21 year old Social Work student living in South Florida while working full time for a local hospice as well. As you may or may not know, I have Spina Bifida Occulta, more specifically lipomyelomeningocele (my specific case is in the 5% in the world in terms of complexity for lipomyelomeningocele)- the definition on Seattle Children's Hospital website is: 'A lipomyelomeningocele is a rare birth defect. A lipomyelomeningocele is a fatty mass covered in skin that is attached to the spinal cord." This has caused several underlying conditions such as the following: -a tethered spinal cord, where my cord is stuck on a section of my spine. The proliferation of scar tissue after each surgery increases the chances of nerve damage/paralysis each time. -numbness of my legs. -a neurogenic bladder, which basically means my bladder is paralyzed with the need to catheterize seven times a day. -sacroiliitis, a subsidiary of rheumatoid arthritis, where the cells in the sacral joints of my hip are attacking themselves, causing prolonged damage and chronic pain. I had surgery in July of 2015 to drain a cyst and separate my spinal cord from my spinal column. After this operation, I had a CSF leak that caused SEVERE headaches, loss of mobility, and nausea. I've been diagnosed with CRPS, a painful condition caused by severe nerve damage that occurred during my last surgery due to negligence and lack of monitoring. Basically, my nerves are permanently stuck in a state of hyperactive overdrive and react by sending my body painful signals to even the most regular activities, my body no longer can tell the difference between danger and normal life. The brush of sheets on my legs and the lightest of touches is extremely painful and uncomfortable to me. If left unmonitored, CRPS has the ability to damage the other nerves around it. My neurosurgeon and I are experimenting with certain nerve pain medications. On December 1st, I will be having surgery number 16, which will use a piece of tissue from my thigh to support my bladder and (hopefully) correct a lot of issues that I've been having lately. If I can offer one bit of advice to anyone, it's that although you can't change what happens to you, you CAN a change how it alters your outlook on life!

10 Things We Learned from Dating Someone in a Wheelchair If you are new to the world of wheelchairs your life has probably been filled with new experiences and new information. Over the years we have learned many things about being in a relationship with someone in a wheelchair. Some lessons have been life altering, some lessons have hurt physically and some lessons leave us in a fit of laughter. Here's our top 10 list of things we have learned from being a wheelchair spouse. 1. People are going to stare; and that's ok. When we say stares we mean an array of different looks. Some are pity stares, some are curious and some are just downright rude. Continue with confidence and don't take it personally. 2. All spinal cord injuries and people in chairs are different. Before we knew our men on wheels we thought if you were paralyzed it meant from the waist down. Essentially you just couldn't move your legs. We learned very quickly that this is not the case. Each injury level or disease is as unique as each individual person and story. 3. The world is not wheelchair accessible. Next time you go for a walk, bike ride, or drive, take a look around you. Notice the stairs without ramps? Notice the curbs without openings? Notice that the bar your in only has high tables? There is still a lot of work to do to make this world more wheelchair friendly. 4. Shit happens... or doesn't. When you're in bed, in the car, out for dinner. Same with pee...when you're least expecting it. 5. UTI's are the man's version of PMS. Seriously, don't mess with a man who has a UTI; they are hormonal, they have cramps and they are miserable. And no, throwing chocolate at them doesn't work. 6. Skin Issues...due to limited or zero sensation being aware of cuts, bruises and sores is very important. A skin issue gone unnoticed could be critical and lead to a hospital visit. 7. Assume they can do anything without help unless they say otherwise. There is nothing they find more frustrating that people helping them do things that they can do themselves...like open the door, or put their chair in their vehicle. 8. It's ok if it doesn't work out. A relationship is a relationship and no one should feel pressured to continue one just because your partner is in a chair. 9. All jobs are purple jobs. In most relationships there is a division of labor. Guys jobs and girls jobs; blue jobs and pink jobs. But when you're in a relationship with a person in a wheelchair the blue and pink get combined and every job becomes purple. 10. Be aware of where your toes are at all times. Casters hurt... a lot. Despite our list there are endless things we have learn't and continue learning. One thing we can agree on that has been a major learning lesson is that dating or marrying someone in a wheelchair is the same as having a relationship with an able bodied person. It may take a little getting used to but soon enough the wheelchair disappears and what you are left with is all the “normal” aspects of living and loving with a significant other. Pushing on... Sam & Chelsea